Toxic friends come and go but at the end of the day, it’s really up to us to decide if we want to keep them in our lives. But what do you do when that toxic friend has a knack for being there at your most vulnerable moments? Your first experience with being cheated on, getting in a bad argument, or even when you’ve just had your fill of being nice to not-so-nice people on a not-so-nice day. How do you say no to someone who’s always there to comfort you, especially during the times when you need it the most?

Your friends tell you not to take them back, that you don’t need that extra weight on your shoulders (and everywhere else), that you have plenty of other friends who will fill that void in your soul just as effectively. But deep down in your heart, you know that those other alternatives would never do the job as well, no matter how much better for you they are. Bland, boring, bitter; they’re everything that your special friend isn’t. But knowing that everyone else would disapprove if they find out how tightly knitted your bond with this friend is, you keep your relationship a secret; only to be unveiled behind closed doors, in the comfort of your favourite sofa as you both settle in for a long night of unwinding and watching your favourite TV shows.

So dear Chocolate… Comforter of my soul, bringer of bad calories, transporter of fats to my already-susceptible love handles, I know this isn’t a healthy relationship but I just can’t quit you. Through thick and thin (but mostly thick for obvious reasons), you’ve made my life sweeter, richer and more bearable than it would have been otherwise. Whenever I needed you, you were always there to coat my insides with sweet, cocoa flavoured fat and inspire a burst of endorphin at just the right time.

You are the chink in my armor, the kryptonite to my Superhuman powers and my Achilles heel all at the same time. In the knowing words of highly revered songstress Britney Spears, “I’m addicted to you. Don’t you know that you’re toxic?” Everyone says that you’re no good for me, that I’d be much better off cutting you out of my life completely and that my devotion to you is unhealthy, but they don’t know me like you do. I’ve loved you for always and I’ll continue to do so for eternity.

Happy World Chocolate Day to one of the best companions in life that money can buy!

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Jazreel
"I'm the writer your mother warned you about." A modern South East Asian girl who's ahead of her time and currently in the midst of self-rebranding. Plans on being a lazy, entitled, money-driven millennial even when she's seventy. A perfect combination of all four Golden Girls, her fruit equivalent would be a spicy strawberry.